Rather, I'll own up to having been on a personal quest for years to determine what, for me, constitutes an authentic and personally relevant sense of manhood. I think a lot of men and way too many boys are on that same journey. It's in part why I do this blog, and maybe, why you read it.
So I found it interesting when Boysen Hodgson, a friend of mine, took it on himself to begin to describe for himself what he calls The New Macho paradigm. Boysen is a member of the ManKind Project and you can see his article in context and other related articles on the MKP website. With his permission, his description is reproduced below for your consideration. He says he is well aware that it is a work in progress . . . perhaps like men and the definition of manhood today!
I like it! What do you think?
The New Macho
He cleans up after himself.
He cleans up the planet.
He is a role model for young men.
He is rigorously honest and fiercely optimistic.
He holds himself accountable.
He knows what he feels.
He knows how to cry and he lets it go.
He knows how to rage without hurting others.
He knows how to fear and how to keep moving.
He seeks self-mastery.
He's let go of childish shame.
He feels guilty when he's done something wrong.
He is kind to men, kind to women, kind to children.
He teaches others how to be kind.
He says he's sorry.
He stopped blaming women or his parents or men for his pain years ago.
He stopped letting his defenses ruin his relationships.
He stopped letting his penis run his life.
He has enough self respect to tell the truth.
He creates intimacy and trust with his actions.
He has men that he trusts and that he turns to for support.
He knows how to roll with it.
He knows how to make it happen.
He is disciplined when he needs to be.
He is flexible when he needs to be.
He knows how to listen from the core of his being.
He's not afraid to get dirty.
He's ready to confront his own limitations.
He has high expectations for himself and for those he connects with.
He looks for ways to serve others.
He knows he is an individual.
He knows that we are all one.
He knows he is an animal and a part of nature.
He knows his spirit and his connection to something greater.
He knows that the future generations are watching his actions.
He builds communities where people are respected and valued.
He takes responsibility for himself and is also willing to be his brother's keeper.
He knows his higher purpose.
He loves with fierceness.
He laughs with abandon, because he gets the joke.
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I like it and would like to pass it on to the men in our BetterMen circle.
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