The Man-Making Blog is a practical and inspirational resource
for people interested in supporting our young males
on their journey to manhood.

July 24, 2015

Helping Potentially Lethal Young Men

I often speak about severely under-male-nourished young men who are lost, imprisoned, or even dying for lack of adult male blessing and guidance. Very often, these are young males who have nothing positive to say about a father or adult man. I'm talking ZERO positive connection to good men and often lots of damage from a bad dad or the other men who are in their lives. The result is an emotionally damaged kid full of anger and teen bravado. The mask of, "I'm fine and I don't need anybody" is hard set on these guys, and they can put the whole community in danger.

Because of their predictable deficits, these young men are at high risk for making very bad life choices. But IF a man or group of men can connect with them while being very patient and working gently, many young men can have their life's trajectory altered and many can be saved. It often takes a long time to connect with these guys and a lot of courage on the part of these young men to risk trusting men again.

So I was not surprised when one of you sent along this great article from Mother Jones describing how a combination of mentoring by good men and cash incentives are being combined to reduce violence and homicides in Richmond, California. The article states in 2007 Richmond, "had the dubious distinction of being the ninth most dangerous in America." They had 47 homicides that year which meant in some places, gunfire was almost a daily event. Research into those numbers in 2009 revealed a rather surprising fact: "An estimated 70 percent of shootings and homicides in Richmond in 2009 were caused by just a few individuals . . . between the ages of 16 and 25." With the city's "potentially most lethal young men" identified, in combinations with other interventions, they set up Operation Peacemaker Fellowship (OPF), now known nationally as "the Richmond Model.”

The most innovative aspect of Operation Peacemaker Fellowship was the bait. The deal was if the young men, called Fellows, maintained their program commitment for six months — attending meetings, staying out of trouble, and connecting with their mentors, they became eligible to earn up to $1,000 a month for a maximum of nine months and to go on big trips to see the world. With gun violence in the U.S. costing an estimated $229 billion dollars a year, the average cost to taxpayers of every gun homicide in America is nearly $400,000. With only about half the Operation Peacemaker Fellowship participants getting payments at all (usually in the $300 to $700 range) meant the cost of the initiative was a bargain given the results.

As a result of OPF and its other initiatives, by 2014 Richmond recorded a 76 percent reduction in homicides and a 69 percent reduction in firearm assaults from the 2007 data. That's the lowest number of firearm assaults and homicides in their community in more than four decades. Of the 68 OPF Fellows who participated over the past 43 month period: 65 are alive (95%); 64 have not been injured by firearm (94%); and 57 (84%) have not been involved in any gun activity. These are huge victories given the scope and scale of the challenge!

. . . the benefits of connecting with these young guys
are much bigger than just fewer shootings.

The OPF men doing the mentoring are called Neighborhood Change Agents, and together they now work with about 150 young guys a year. While saving lives and reducing gang activity is impressive, they've learned the benefits of connecting with these young guys are much bigger than just fewer shootings. Many of the "potentially most lethal" young men in the OFP program are now in school or in jobs. These young men are doing more parenting, less drug use, and causing less violence in general. They have moved on from predictable criminal dead ends to involvement in programs that have changed the trajectory of their lives and are improving their neighborhoods in the process.

Check out this video from Richmond TV station KCBS for more of the story!
"They have to be willing to get on a plane with someone who is trying to kill you!"

The good men of Operation Peacemaker Fellowship are my heroes working on the front lines of the struggle to reclaim our lost boys and our communities. We need to honor them and learn from their experience. But to be very clear, ALL young men, even those with great families and engaged fathers, can use the objectivity and support of solid adult men. If teen males of any background can find their way to a place where there is support from good men, they will gradually open up and let you see the truth behind the mask they wear (and they all do). In those circles you can actually witness the effect of the group support, good information, personal feedback, and the positive attention working on them. You can watch as they become more confident, smile more often, and, most importantly, make better life choices.

That is what's at the heart of man-making!



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July 9, 2015

Groups for men and young men . . . EVERYWHERE?

Some of you know about the gifts of transformation that occur when men gather in a circle to speak their personal truths. I've spent over thirty years in men's support groups of one kind or another and I can say from experience, when the bond of trust has been formed in a group, regardless of the group member's age, magic happens and better men are the result. It's one place where real man-making occurs.

I've seen this magic in countless men's circles, in school groups of young males, and even on weekend passage adventures. If you make a safe place for guys to show up un-masked, you will eventually hear profound honesty about the fears, joys, pain, hopes, anger, longings, and all the parts of males that otherwise lie hidden in confusion behind the face they show the world.

Because of the power of these circles to improve lives, I'm of the opinion that more groups should be available to men and young males. Sadly, in addition to the fears so many males carry about the risks of real intimacy and vulnerability, there are other real world barriers to group attendance. Finding a group at all, or one close enough geographically to be practical, is an issue for many. Then you have to find a group that meets at a time that fits into your busy life. For some, especially the young guys, finding transportation to get to a group can make regular attendance difficult or impossible. For these reasons (and many others), I really like the idea of digital, on-line support groups!

. . . for me, meeting on-line
is far better than not meeting at all.

While I'll admit I have a large bias in favor of being in a face-to-face circle of males as opposed to looking at them on a screen, there is no question for me that meeting on-line is far better than not meeting at all. I have been exploring different platforms for holding on-line, topic-focused meetings. In a conversation with my friend, Luis Oliveira, he mentioned he was a member of an on-line support group. His group was started by Graham Reid Phoenix, the author of the e-book, Journey to the Core of the Masculine. Graham launched the on-line support group two years ago, and it's now called, "The Virtual Men's Gathering." Graham lives in Spain, Luis is in Portugal, and the other men in the group are scattered across the globe. This group is proof that geography doesn't count for much anymore when it comes to man-making.

. . . geography doesn't count for much anymore
when it comes to man-making.


Because The Virtual Men's Gathering is such a good example of how an on-line group for men works, I interviewed Graham and Luis in a Google Hangout to see what we all can learn about this digital approach to man-making. In the video below you'll hear about the benefits of a digital support group, some nuts and bolts about how they work, how they differ from face-to-face groups, and there's even some help if you're thinking of starting an on-line group of your own.

Check out the video and then either contact Graham or send me a quick note and let's see how we can use these amazing digital tools to enhance the lives of men and young males . . . everywhere!


If this clip doesn't show up use this link.



SHARE: If you enjoy this blog, please click the Facebook "Share" button below to support the Man-Making Facebook page! (The button is only on the MM Blog, and not in subscription posts delivered by email.)


CONTACT: Send Earl a message. I'm very interested in your thoughts on any man-making post or topic. I'm available to help bring man-making initiatives to your community or organization.

SUBSCRIBE: If you're not yet a subscriber to the Man-Making Blog, and you'd like to receive these posts by email 3-4 times a month, use this link for a free subscription.

TWEET: Send this post along to your friends or follow me on Twitter!