Guys - Check Your Balls!

NOTE: I'll be traveling in Spain for the month of September. Here is a timely and popular post from the archive.

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Among other places, this poster appeared in the women's toilet in a Hobart (Tasmania) pub. Do you think this is this going too far?

Click to Enlarge Poster

We seem to live in a very pink world these days, where so much (important) attention is given to women's breast cancer awareness. Yet it seems odd to me that a poster using the word "balls" and suggesting men (and their partners) should be checking them, might be seen as more than a little provocative. Given the data on testicular and other cancers for men, maybe not!

. . . men are 33% more likely
to be diagnosed
with cancer
than women. . .

One in 268 men will be diagnosed with cancer of the testes during their lifetime. While we often think of this as an older man's disease, while rare, it's the most common cancer in males between 15 and 45. It peaks in males in their mid-twenties. Other cancers causing death in guys include lung, prostate, bowel, and melanoma. As the poster states, men are 33% more likely to be diagnosed with cancer than women, and 30% more men will die of the disease than women! Given these numbers, it seems to me we should have more loud and bold approaches to men's balls and this aspect of men's health directed at both teem males and men.

Blue September (blueseptember.org) is a global awareness and fundraising initiative for all men’s cancers. Blue was chosen as a men's color as pink is the preferred color for women's breast cancer awareness. Since starting in New Zealand, the Blue September movement has migrated to Australia, the United States, the United Kingdom, and Ireland. The Blue September blokes in Australia, who created the poster, are supporting Australian Prostate Cancer Research and The Australian Cancer Research Foundation. They say each year, more than 22,000* Australian men die of cancer. For the record, the number for annual male deaths in the US is 33,000.

GO NUTS! Just one of many campaigns across the globe included a Blue September event in the US, prior to the Oakland Raiders/Pittsburgh Steelers game, September 23, 2012. It turns out research says walnuts can improve prostate heath. In order to raise awareness about testicular and other cancers for men, prior to the game, fans were given a package of California walnuts, blue wrist bands, and health information. The jumbo screens also showed a pre-game video on the topic. What a great way to bring this topic to a male audience.

Are you willing to help get the word out to young men and adult males? It would be a sad thing to lose a guy at any age to testicular cancer just because we can't comfortably talk about gonads, nads, nuts, testicles, rocks, bollocks, sack nuggets, groin, the acorns, cracker jacks, stones, kerbangers, marbles, the yam bag, your junk, tenders, cullions, the dangly bits, pelotas, nutsack, doo-dahs, bollocks, huevos, kiwis, clappers, family jewels, cojones, the package, knackers, cods, love spuds, and yes, balls.

Here are some links to great videos and information on Blue September, testicular cancer, and Testicular Self-Exam (TSE) for men and young males:

• A clip of Ireland's Munster Rugby Team getting painted blue for the cause.


• A really great website, checkemlads.com, is run by men who are cancer survivors. You'll hear them tell moving personal stories, see a very informative video clip, and get some TSE instruction from straight talking men.


• A great teen health website, kidshealth.org, with some very straight forward instructions on how to do Testicular Self-Exam (TSE).

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Fire Circles - Opening the Hearts of Men and Boys

This article is offered by Allan Rudner, a brother in mission, working in Sydney, Australia. It's his personal story about his powerful connection to fire and how he is using it to create new connections between diverse communities of men and boys.

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Since boyhood, I have been called to fire. I grew up in South Africa, living half a block from bushland, where I spent many happy hours on my own or with boyhood friends. From time to time, a wildfire would break out and the flames could be seen leaping high into the sky. I remember getting as close to the fire as I could and feeling my heart pounding inside me. I could actually feel the raw wildness and energy of the fire coursing through my veins. In those moments, I was in complete awe and knew I had found my passion!

Now, after working with boys and men in the wilderness for the last twenty years, that passion for fire is back in full force, and its call is powerful. Over the years, my Rites-of-Passage work has always included some relationship to fire. It has always accompanied rituals and ceremonies, signifying the transitions from boyhood to manhood and manhood to Elder. But currently, I’m called to fire circles!

Today, I’m using the timeless and primal notion of The Fire Circle to connect diverse groups of older men with younger men/boys. In these circles, older men take their place as leaders and mentors within the community, and younger men/boys have access to a network of positive male role models. My approach has been carefully crafted to ensure a sense of safety and caring for everyone. Using ritual and ceremony around the sacred fire, men and boys are introduced to respectful and confidential processes for sharing personal stories. The goal is for everyone to have an opportunity to be listened to and to be heard.

After a couple of hours together in a typical fire circle, the group formally closes the space and then retires to an area where food is shared. The impact of the time around the fire is always obvious as the group mingles, talks, laughs and, informally, connects with one another.

From the feedback I've gotten, it is clear The Fire Circle experience is very much appreciated and valued. Here are a just a couple of the (common) comments I get from participants:

"I thought your fire circle was beautifully established and run. It was just the right blend of gentle firm guidance and freedom/space for personal responsibility. I feel that evening living in my body right now. I encountered myself in a new way and with magical universal input. The timing was spot on. It augmented my ability to try to be differently with my son, my brother and father." - RK

"I believe you got the recipe right last evening, around the warmth of the fire and in the spirituality of the Tepee. Twenty-two men, of such varying age and divergent backgrounds, would normally have passed each other by along the path of life with barely a spoken word, perhaps, at best, a nod. By creating a space of safety and oneness of purpose, the differences between all these men were relegated to a position of minor significance. The common desire for personal growth, the sharing and purpose, shone forth in openness and truth. I am enriched for the experience. Thanks." - Ralph

I believe The Fire Circle process is creating a valuable community resource by building more connections between diverse men and strong inter-generational relationships. The Fire Circle creates new roles for older men in our communities, and the youth benefit by being witnessed and accepted as they are by Elder men. In short, it's exciting for me to watch this process building stronger and more cohesive communities.

At the personal level, The Fire Circle is how I find my way to my spiritual home. No sooner do I seat myself around the fire than I feel a flood of peace and alignment, which so often eludes me in the “outside world.” When I see the opened heart of a lad or a man, I feel the energy flowing inside me. When guys "get it," and the tears flow, and their woundedness is shared, my heart melts, and I know I am doing something important. Helping to open men's hearts and seeing them come awake gives me the juice I need to keep going. I believe when a man has an open heart, the world is a better place.

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Currently The Fire Circles take place at different venues in and around Sydney, Australia, with a growing interest in hosting them in other areas. If you want to connect with Allan to learn more about his fire circle process, check out his LifeCrating website, or visit The Fire Circle Facebook page. You can also email Allan Rudner directly.

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Guys - Check Your Balls!

Among other places, this poster appeared in the women's toilet in a Hobart (Tasmania) pub. Is this going too far?

Click to Enlarge Poster

We seem to live in a very pink world these days, where so much (important) attention is given to women's breast cancer awareness. Yet it seems odd to me that a poster using the word "balls" and suggesting men (and their partners) should be checking them, might be seen as more than a little provocative. Given the data on testicular and other cancers for men, maybe not!

One in 268 men will be diagnosed with cancer of the testes during their lifetime. While we often think of this as an older man's disease, while rare, it's the most common cancer in males between 15 and 45. It peaks in males in their mid-twenties. Other cancers causing death in guys include lung, prostate, bowel, and melanoma. As the poster states, men are 33% more likely to be diagnosed with cancer than women, and 30% more men will die of the disease than women! Given these numbers, it seems to me we should have more loud and bold approaches to men's balls and this aspect of men's health directed at both teem males and men.

Blue September (http://www.blueseptember.org/) is a global awareness and fundraising initiative for all men’s cancers. Blue was chosen as a men's color as pink is the preferred color for women's breast cancer awareness. Since starting in New Zealand, the Blue September movement has migrated to Australia, the United States, the United Kingdom, and Ireland. The Blue September blokes in Australia, who created the poster, are supporting Australian Prostate Cancer Research and The Australian Cancer Research Foundation. They say each year, more than 22,000* Australian men die of cancer. For the record, the number for annual male deaths in the US is 33,000.

GO NUTS! Just one of many campaigns across the globe included a Blue September event in the US, prior to the Oakland Raiders/Pittsburgh Steelers game, September 23, 2012 (see link below). It turns out research says walnuts can improve prostate heath. In order to raise awareness about testicular and other cancers for men, prior to the game, fans were given a package of California walnuts, blue wrist bands, and health information. The jumbo screens also showed a pre-game video on the topic. What a great way to bring this topic to a male audience.

Are you willing to help get the word out to young men and adult males? It would be a sad thing to lose a guy at any age to testicular cancer just because we can't comfortably talk about gonads, nads, nuts, testicles, rocks, bollocks, sack nuggets, groin, the acorns, cracker jacks, stones, kerbangers, marbles, the yam bag, your junk, tenders, cullions, the dangly bits, pelotas, nutsack, doo-dahs, bollocks, huevos, kiwis, clappers, family jewels, cojones, the package, knackers, cods, love spuds, and yes, balls.

Here are some links to great videos and information on Blue September, testicular cancer, and Testicular Self-Exam (TSE) for men and young males:

• A clip of Ireland's Munster Rugby Team getting painted blue for the cause.


• A really great website, checkemlads.com run by regular guy cancer survivors. They tell moving personal stories, a very informative video clip, and some TSE instruction from straight talking men.


• A great teen health website, kidshealth.org, with some very straight forward instructions on how to do Testicular Self-Exam (TSE).

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You, Me, Us, and Ubuntu

Ubuntu is an ancient African word meaning humanity to others. Another beautiful interpretation, attributed to Archbishop Desmond Tutu goes, Ubuntu is not, “I think therefore I am.” It says rather: “I am a human because I belong. I participate. I share.” Or more literally, "I am because you are." 

Ubuntu speaks to the heart of our essential interdependence. It's about the power we have as a collection of common humanity, to care for and about each other. It's about what happens when we touch this sense of we-ness, and use it to change ourselves and lift others up. We express it by giving of ourselves, naturally, to the rest of our community for the common good.

Ubuntu is a notion in direct opposition to the ideas of fierce independence, selfishness, I don't need anyone's help, and especially, their problems have nothing to do with me and I shouldn't get involved. Bill Clinton once said about Ubuntu, ". . . the world is too small, our wisdom too limited, our time here too short, to waste any more of it in winning fleeting victories at other people's expense." He was suggesting we need each other way more than we realize.

Ubuntu shows up in people who dedicate their lives to fighting injustice against all odds, and in some large or small way, being relentless about making a difference in the lives of people who need help and support. I've profiled many of them in these posts, especially the men who unselfishly show up for other people's sons. I consider these men my heroes. In people who give of themselves to our communities in so many ways, Ubuntu seems to be an almost instinctual and selfless commitment to others.

It often happens in times of crisis when our connection to each other rises above all the things that separate and distance us from each other. It's the call that gets the neighbors together in a flood to rescue those who are trapped. It is what's working when strangers show up to help dig out someone whose home was just blown apart by a tornado. It's a force which, if we were inclined, could go a long way to help the homeless, the hungry, schools that desperately need community support, and the thousands of young males lost on their confusing journey to manhood who are waiting for a good man to show up as a friend and guide.
 
Check out the video below. It's one of many powerful demonstrations of Ubuntu the United States has seen in recent times. Then stop and consider what we could accomplish in our communities if we could elicit just a little more Ubuntu.

I am a human because I belong. I participate. I share.

I am because you are.

If the clip is not visible go to THIS LINK.

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Leaving Neverland - Why Little Boys Shouldn't Run Big Corporations

Leaving Neverland is a very timely book, hot off the press, and sure to be a winner. The author, Daniel Prokop, states, Little boys wearing men's bodies and designer suits convinced authorities to put them in charge of the banking cookie jar. We shouldn’t be surprised that they helped themselves to our cookies. And my favorite, When little boys playing in the Gulf of Mexico broke a big, shiny toy and made a catastrophic mess, surely we can all agree that it is time for us to Leave Neverland.

Among other professions, Daniel Prokop has run his own business, is an experienced Rites of Passage leader, and a stand-up comic. He confesses he once worked as a laborer on a big turkey farm where they were doing artificial insemination . . . which he says put him off having sex with turkeys for life. He also spent 13 years working in an unnamed oil company with a BIG red and yellow logo, which has given him some perspective on big boys and shiny oily toys.

You can order the book and read the table of contents and first chapter at the Leaving Neverland website. While I'm sure the book will be an informative, thoughtful, and very entertaining read, at $39.95 a copy for those of us outside of Australia, it will take a lot of screamingly positive reviews to put it on most people's must get list. Daniel is working on making his book available via Print on Demand in the US and Europe and also as an E-book. I'll let you know when those editions come available.

The good news is that the discussion about little boys in big boy suits behaving badly is well under way. In this clip the author discusses his philosophy and the importance of Rite of Passage experiences in the lives of boys and men.

Go to this link if the video isn't visible.

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Leap Now - Ring of Fire

LEAPNOW is an organization based in Calistoga, CA, and dedicated to fostering consciousness and integrity in the world by working with "emerging adults." They run “soul-centered programs” that combine outer journeys (to Latin America, India, Africa), with a personal journey inward. Their flagship program, LEAPYEAR, works with students for a full year. Their mission is to set the stage for young adults to blossom. They claim young people always emerge from this program with a greater understanding of themselves and what it means to be approaching adulthood in today’s world.

One of their new programs is called Ring of Fire (RoF), a four-month adventure for young men 17 to 24. RoF was created to answer to deep need of young men who have "lost traction" in their lives. In this program, a small group of males adventure their way through Central and South America. This trek is along the Eastern edge of the chain of volcanoes that circles the Pacific Ocean and is why the program is called Ring of Fire. Along the way they examine their lives, face challenges, and explore their shadows. The program is designed to develop a strong sense of self, while training young men in the skills of leadership. It all comes together at the end of the trip with a powerful rite of passage ceremony.

The good folks at LEAPNOW believe the fastest growth happens for an individual when you combine an outer journey (trekking the Incan Trail, planting trees in the Amazon, building houses for the poor, climbing a volcano) with a profoundly personal inward journey. I only wish that the Ring of Fire experience was available when I was in that age group!

For more information on the Ring of Fire program, visit the LEAPNOW website, or contact the program coordinator, Jesse Latimer, at jesse@leapnow.org or 707-431-7265.

If you know about or have experienced a similar program for ripening young people, please share a brief description. The world needs globally literate and self-aware young people in the pipe line.

Generation WE

Millennials are the largest generation in American history. Born between 1978 and 2000, they are 95 million strong, compared to 78 million Baby Boomers. As the clip below will demonstrate, they really are our future. Because of their numbers, they will have the social, economic, and political clout to change our world, a world that is tragically in need of changing.

I think the question we should be asking is, what can we, today's adults, be doing to support their growth into people of passion and character?

Milennials believe they have more in common with young adults of their generation in other countries than they have with Americans of older generations.

 On the Gen-We website (gen-we.com)you can learn more about this group, and even download a free PDF copy of the book, Generation WE - How Millennial Youth Are Taking Over America and Changing Our World Forever, by Eric Greenberg.

If the clip doesn't show up, use this link.

The Boy Who Harnessed the Wind

David H. sent along a link to an amazing story of a 14 year-old boy and book about his life. David said, How about this for an inspiring boy/man story? Nourish a young person's spirit and their curiosity and look what can happen!

This is the link to the Wired magazine article about 14 year-old William Kamkwamba, a boy from a small village WAY off the electrical grid in Malawi. William saw a photo of a windmill in a textbook and with that picture and an amazing amount of creativity and drive, has built a series of windmills that according to Wired, now generate enough electricity to light several bulbs in his family’s house, power radios and a TV, charge his neighbors’ cellphones and pump water for the village’s fields and household use.

This is a very inspirational tale of a boy's innate creativity and love of tinkering, building, and exploration. It's a real day-brightener.

Through articles published about his creation, William was "discovered," and the result is a book about his story and a number of very inspirational video clips like the one below. I can imagine showing these clips to a group of boys and then challenging them to do what William did . . . make a backyard windmill!

Check out this link if the video clip doesn't appear.

YouTube clip:

Coaching Boys into Men - A Handbook

Many of the men reading this will have a story about their coach and the difference he made in his life. A man who took on the responsibility to shape a rag-tag group of testosterone fueled young males into a competitive team. "Coach," was a man who cared about you and who wielded the power and influence to teach not just athletic skills, but to instill the values of respect for others, teamwork, patience, tolerance for differences, and personal integrity along the way. If you have a coach like that in your background, tell us about him with a short remembrance in the comments section of this post.

Because of the power of a coach in a young male's life, it's not surprising that coaches as a group are being singled out as a force for changing the world as man-makers. One example is the focus on coaches in conjunction with the FIFA Soccer World Cup tournament in South Africa in 2010. UNICEF is planning to use the excitement surrounding the games to launch its Sports for Development Program. UNICEF has partnered with the South African Department of Education to reinvigorate a sports program called Coaching Boys into Manhood (CBIM).

The intention is to recreate a new International Coaches Manual based on concepts from the original Coaching Boys into Men Playbook, and enlist international celebrity soccer coaches and players, such as David Beckham, as “teachers” of violence prevention. Then CBIM will be distributed around South Africa, providing 585 schools and communities with coaches who will serve as liaisons between the school community, governing bodies, and key stakeholders in the effort to improve the lives of children.

Check out the CBIM playbook. It describes the FIFA Fair Play Code and has quotes like the following to inspire and challenge men and coaches everywhere:

By encouraging players to build healthy relationships with teammates, friends, families, opponents, referees and fans, and by promoting a non-violent environment on and off the playing field, coaches can help create a more peaceful world.

And really solid young men.

If you're a coach, thanks for your man-making. You are a gift to us all. You may find the Coaches Corner and the Coaches Kit on a website of the Family Violence Prevention Fund to be helpful.

YMAW – Young Men’s Adventure Weekend

Another powerful Man-Making group operating out of British Columbia is the Young Men’s Adventure Weekend or YMAW. Brad Leslie is coordinating this year’s gathering on July 10th – 12th, and an amazing event it will be.

Imagine an event planned and supervised by a production team of fifty adult men to host on average 70–80 Young Men between the ages of 12 and 17 for a long weekend. Now that’s what real commitment to Man-Making looks like.

It all started sixteen years ago, a group of men were discussing the plight of today’s male teenagers and the tough challenges they face transitioning into manhood. Deciding they wanted to do something about it, this group of volunteer men created the Young Men’s Adventure Weekend as a wilderness experience.

As describe on their website, the purpose of their work is to:

• To assist, develop and foster the individual spirit of Young Men;
• To encourage Young Men to become responsible and accountable for themselves;
• To become team players by supporting and working with each other;
• Preparation for adult life

From the reports and the comments on their site, they more than accomplish those goals every year.

This is a link to a truly inspirational video about the YMAW and here’s another link to some photos that really do tell the story. I guarantee that just checking out these links will rearrange some of you Man-Making molecules.

To learn more about this incredible undertaking, visit the YMAW website at:
http://www.ymaw.com/

If you hurry, there is even time to sign up for this year’s YMAW! Contact Brad Leslie at: bradleslie@telus.net

Tasmanian Wildmen

To build solid young males, you need committed, motivated, male-literate men. That's why I like to occasionally profile organizations pursuing men's development. One solid organization that has been doing that since 1999 is the Tasmanian Men's Health and Wellbeing Association, Inc.

Their most recent offering is the upcoming Explore the Wildman meeting in Waddamama, Tasmania, March 6 through the 9th, 2009. Rob Dalton, one of my connections there asks these compelling questions, "Where is that part of you that knows exactly what it wants to do and won't let fear or anything else get in the way?" Your source for living,"Raw, energetic, powerful, passionate and full of life." As Rob says, it promises to be a time for, "Exceptional cooking, reflection, new experiences, ritual, humor, delight, and an opportunity to explore your Wildman with other men from around Australia.

As a prelude to that gathering, the Second National Elders Gathering will be held from the 4th of March to mid-day on the 6th. It's theme is Letting Go of the Warrior. Elders will gather to discuss changing lives, energy, emotions, and roles, all in the contexts of self, families, community and spirit.

As men evolve and experience the powerful mutual support at these meetings, our communities are profoundly enriched. The supply of men modeling a positive and authentic masculinity for young males grows, and we all benefit. Given what's in it for you and the other males around you, you'll consider starting a meeting like this in your own community? Or just engage your wildman and do it!

For information on what these Tasmen are doing, contact Rob Dalton at robjdalton@gmail.com, or visit Tasmen's website.

Band of Brothers: Older Men Learning to Bless. . . and Step into their Right Male Place

Witness the opening of the hearts and minds of men. Men finding themselves, so they are prepared to bless and support boys. It's a beautiful thing.



If the video is not visible, you can view it at this link.

Is there a hunger for this in you?