Teaching Young Guys How to Dress

Tim Wernette is a regular contributor to the Man-Making Blog. He sent along this video clip saying, "I've noticed that boys/young men often don't know the proper method for dressing/undressing, and thought you might enjoy this video."

I'll say more on the other side of the clip...

Use this link if the clip doesn't appear.

OK, it's not really about dressing, or undressing, although that topic deserves its own post. Tim sent it along as a JOKE . . . kind of!

If you look closely, beyond the "humor," there are a lot of other issues raised by the clip. Tim Wernette, is a Gender Equity Educational Specialist with the University of Arizona. He speaks to high school audiences about the destructive aspects of gender stereotypes overlaid on young boys and girls. Tim suggested that behind what passes for humor in the clip is actually a story about the dangerous lengths to which men and young males go to test themselves, to self-initiate, to demonstrate their bravery and skills. Perhaps to live up to the super-male stereotype so common in sports, music, and the media these days.

Boys can easily be victimized by their own biology.

Of course, there is the very real matter of large and multiple surges of testosterone in an adolescent male's body every day. Testosterone has been called the aggression chemical. It's the drug that makes it hard for boys to sit still in classrooms, be defiant around authority figures, be competitive, and sometimes do foolish and dangerous things. Boys can easily be victimized by their own biology.

Yes, boys will be boys. But with good men in their lives to help manage and direct that awesome young male energy, young guys are more inclined to make good choices when it comes to testing their power and proving themselves. Without those good men, young males are left with making up "manhood" on their own. Sadly, they are being guided by the tragic models of manhood provided by film, TV, and too many not-so-good men we read about every day in the papers.

Thanks Tim! Keep up the good work.

By the way, I love guest contributors!

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Nature-Deficit Disorder

Most of us, at some level, understand that kids and teens don’t get outside enough. Who does these days? As a child I spent every non-school moment possible out of doors, hanging out at the “playground,” getting in trouble with my boy tribe, and coming “in” only when it was time to eat. We had a large (to a young male) chunk of undeveloped property behind our home that was a natural forest. It was our magic world, both a little frightening and a place my little band of guys could escape and find some adventure. At school, we had outdoor play, called recess, as an important part of a school day. Even winter weather in MN wasn’t a barrier to building “forts,” and the joys of making just about everything a target for a snowball. Sadly, for today’s young people in the digital age, much of that lifestyle has gone away.

One author, Richard Louv, has started a global conversation about the issue and given the sit in front of a screen epidemic a name . . . nature-deficit disorder. The new edition of his book, Last Child in the Woods, explains the sad costs he feels result from kids becoming “increasingly disconnected from the natural world,” and living in what he terms a, "denatured childhood." Louv feels that by truly appreciating the role nature can play in a child’s development we may lessen the frequency and severity of childhood physical and emotional issues. Reading this wonderful book will help you understand this important issue, and inspire you to get yourself and the young people in your life off on an outdoor adventure.

A challenging idea this author offers us is that nature needs children! He claims that if we don’t have young people with an appreciation for the beauty of the natural world, who will care enough to become its protective stewards in the future?

Use this link if you want to order Last Child in the Woods from Amazon.com

PS: In a curious combination of the digital and natural worlds, one of this blog’s readers pointed out a new iPhone hiking application. It comes with GPS, and topo maps of hiking trails and state parks! Purchasing the app even supports the American Hiking Society! Hey, if it gets kids outside I’m all for it!

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Kids and Media Addiciton

Here's some data that should be a wake up call:

• By the time a child is eighteen years old, he or she will witness on television (with average viewing time) 200,000 acts of violence including 40,000 murders (Huston, et al, 1992).


• Children, ages 8 to 18, spend more time (44.5 hours per week - 6 1/2 hours daily) in front of computer, television, and game screens than any other activity in their lives except sleeping (Kaiser Family Foundation, 2005).
  

This is just a small taste of what you can learn on the website of the National Institute on Media and the Family (NIMF). They say that at a time in their lives when adolescents should be developing life-sustaining patterns of self-discipline, the ability to delay gratification, perseverance, imagination, and respect, too much exposure to various forms of media results in the adoption the values of more, easy, fast, fun, violence and disrespect. In addition, there is a ton of evidence that demonstrates that kids who watch significant amounts of television and movie violence are more likely to exhibit aggressive behavior, attitudes and values.

The National Institute on Media and the Family has an initiative they call Through-U - Families Become MediaWise, which offers materials, training kits, suggestions for non-media activities, research... and more for those who want to explore these ideas for groups of children or in a family setting. I think this would be especially powerful for a group of young males.

On the website of an organization called TrashYour TV!, there's a 20 question assessment to test a teen's degree of "media addiction." Their assessment is enlightening for ALL of us and it's another organization with a lot to say about the role of TV, video games, and computers in kids lives.

If you have had any experience with these kinds of programs, either formal or the policies in your own home, please tell us about it in the comments section of this post. We do need an army of motivated adults to set good examples and help kids become aware of the world of options that exist when they walk away from a screen.